km_09

Last night, I had so much fun.  Well, not so much but just fun, but it was exciting.  But then, I realize how utterly lonely I am of companionship.  Of someone to hold me.  I went to a party and all I saw throughout the whole time was couple hugging each other, holding each other, having fun with each other.  It open my eyes to my current situation.  I am lonely but oh so afraid. 

Other than that, there was one interesting new.  Last night, I had my first dance with a male.  Shameful isn't it, at this age but it is true.  I have never dance with any male  person in my entire life and this is the first.  It was strange.  Extremely strange.  But it is a moment that I will treasure.  

My life is so lacking, yet it seem that as every day passes by, I keep finding something precious to cherish. 

I know this is totally late, but I finally watch the first episode of season nine of CSI: Las Vegas and damn, was I surprised.  I knew he left the show, but I never thought that he was killed off.  It's stupid of me, but I was genuinely surprise.  And shock.  The word shock just does not fully describe the feeling I had that moment he died in Grissom's arm.  It was so sad, seeing Grissom and everyone else like that.  What a touching scene that was, no matter how devestating it was.  Damn, I was so close to tear when I saw it and I a pretty sure that I will cry when I watch it again.  And the things they said.  About love and family.  How sweet.

This scene made me thought of one of my favorite X Japan song, Forever Love.  Oh My God, does it fit in my mind.  I'm currently listening to it right now and I am so emotional right now.  Yeah.  Warrick  Brown, darn him.  He was one of my favorite character.

Over the past two days I have been making personal notes to myself and things to remember but I am still here.  I think I might delve into writing pretty soon.  Who know.  But if I do happen to, then please remember, I suck at grammar and all the literary devices and anything else related, please don't put me down cruelly.  That's all I ask.  Peace.

Man, I so regrets not posting, though it only has been three days since I last posted.  Anyway, there:

http://community.livejournal.com/valentine_smut

http://community.livejournal.com/yuletide_smut

http://community.livejournal.com/7thnight_smut

http://ovo-kinder.livejournal.com/

http://mickiebg.livejournal.com/profile

http://kimmyjarl.livejournal.com/profile

http://davinci-1985.livejournal.com/profile

http://mercifulkanzeon.livejournal.com/

http://demonrubberduck.livejournal.com/profile

http://blackalchemist.livejournal.com/profile

http://demonrubberduck.livejournal.com/23055.html
Milk and Brownie

That is it for now.  I has not take some time yet to go through more.  These are my tops though and here, I will find them soon enough.  Though it has not yet become in depth yet but it will soon be, which only concern me.

Yep, here I am again.  Just some more things to put down.

http://7veilsphaedra.livejournal.com/93636.html
Great stories

http://jans-intentions.livejournal.com/455820.html?view=15770764#t15770764
Great pictures/stories


.......


If I have more time, I post more on this post. 

7veilsphaedraの素晴らしい自己のおかげで、私が持っていて今日驚異〔不思議〕を発見してください。  私はより早くそれらに中に入らないことのために自分に恥をかかせます。  KoumyouとUkokuは私がこの短い期間に愛するようになった組み合わせることです。  私は明らかにそれらの巨大なファンになりました。  それらの考えが中に一緒にいるので方法〔道〕のどんな感覚〔意味/感じ〕もうわっ正しいです。  それらについて考える時、私は震えを得ます。  それでYay!!  これにずっと多くが言うためにありません。  私がそれらを愛していて、それらを愛し続けて誰がどの位長い間か知っているか。  もう一度、私はこの生命〔生活〕を変える自己発見に対して7veilsphaedraに感謝したいと思います。  KoumyouとUkokuがペアになって行ってください。  万歳．

Thanks to 7veilsphaedra's magnificent self,  I have discover a wonder today.  I shame myself for not getting in to them earlier.  Koumyou and Ukoku is a pairing that I have come to love in this short period of time.  I have obviously become a huge fan of them.  The idea of them being together in any sense of way is just wow.  I get shivers when I think of them.  So Yay!!  There's not much more to say to this.  I love them and will continue to love them who know how long.  Once again, I would like to thank 7veilsphaedra for this life-changing self-discovery.  Go Koumyou and Ukoku pairing.  Banzai.

I officially hates Lj-cut.  It is so hard to figure out.  I edit one post so many time I can't even count how much I actually did it.  Going back and forth, waiting to see if the result are okay but no its not.  I figure I just stick to plain old posting with no little extra.  Simple is good. 

Anyway, it's three in the morning and here I am still.  I just can't go to sleep.  I'm excited to explore more here. 

While I may not be a totally writer kind of person, or even a beta kind of person, I sure can read.  If I get permission, I would like to link some fanfictions here that I absolutely adores.  Be forewarn though, I really like anime so most of mine favorites or recommendation will be anime.  And yaoi of course.  I can't resist.  So no offense to anyone who will take offense and I take no responsibility in other lack of common sense not to read this. 

However, if I do put something of mine up, anything at all, be sure to know that the writing/plot/art is totally mine own and no other unless I stated so.  So cheers.

I know this is late.  Very late.  I cannot help it.  If I cannot keep a diary then who am I to think that I can keep up with an electronic journal.  Saying this, I will try.  It will be hard but trying is good.  Life is good, I love it and I love everything here.  There's not much to complain about.  But one thing that everyone here in United States worries about is the economy.  I do not know where it will go, but I hope for it to go steady soon.  I am sad despite the fact that I love life.  So much is  happening.  I worries about everything and everyone I love. 

Existing here in this dimension is exhausting, but it is what I must deal with.  I wonder how much longer will this go on.  But, as the next week comes, we will see what happen.  A new generation.  A new ruler.  A new leader to lead this country.  We will see how this goes. 

What really worries me is that because of the state of the economy at this moment, hundred of thousands of people will place their hope on the new president.  I am afraid, they have place it so high that the chance of the country not healing fast enough will enrage them to do outrageous things.  It is a scary life here in United State.  Many call it a prime country, but for those that deal with the harsh, harsh reality of the world of United States and those who are unfortunate to live comfortably as they like, United State is a country of constant limits and pressure.  The U.S. is an ugly, ugly world to be in, and will continue to be so.  I wonder how life will be like in the next hundreds years.  I fear that later in life, the U.S. will become yet again a dictatorship.  There is the possibility of that happening no matter what people said.  Freedom does not exist in a democracy world, like it does not exist in a dictator world, or communist world or any other.   Not true freedom anyway.  If you think about it, freedom does not even exist in a anarchy world.  This is what worries me.  The fate of this country and the fate of the world to come.

Don't flame me.